A Graduation Story

I have a little story to share but in order to get to the end, I need to back up and provide some of the beginning.

My son Jacob has cerebral palsy. You may already know that. He has been in a wheelchair his entire life and will always be in a wheelchair. Physically, he has many limitations. Mentally? Not a single one.

When we moved from Toledo to Sylvania, OH. he was (finally) integrated into "regular" classes through Junior High and High School and he excelled. He was well known, well liked and had many people he considered friends. Although these were not students that came to our house to hang out with him, but they talked to him daily and that defined them as friends.

Fast forward to five years ago when he embarked on his college journey. As a family, we decided the best place for him to attend was a smaller, private college a stone's throw from our front door. Literally, we could walk to campus if we needed to. The first year went well, and Jacob was acclimating to college life although it was different from what he had envisioned. Lourdes College (now University) is attended by a majority of non-traditional students: older, married, with careers...and fairly conservative. Jacob was (is) none of these things. So by his second year, he was feeling as though he didn't fit in - that maybe a different college would provide a better experience for him.

His parents (yes, us with limited foresight) thought that the school was a perfect fit. We liked that the attention he received was more personalized, that the campus was a 2 minute drive from home, that all the faculty knew our son personally. The people he interacted with on campus were kind and considerate. But he was not making any friends. We chalked that up to the school being a 90% commuter college and let's face it, you find friends in college when you live in a dorm. So we convinced him to stay into his third year.

As we tried to point out the positives of the school, Jacob became more unhappy and focused on the negatives. Frankly, we just couldn't see what he was seeing. Now let me clarify - no one was ever mean to him. The course work wasn't too hard - or too easy. He just wasn't feeling it. We let him take one class at the University of Toledo to see what it was like. And overall, he loved the atmosphere. Younger, active students - that was what he was missing. But in talking to UT about transferring, we were in for a hefty dose of reality. In order to transfer, Jacob would add approximately three additional years onto his college career as most of his credits would not transfer. The 2 schools were in different accreditation programs. He wouldn't be able to transfer - it just wasn't the logical thing to do.

So we both changed our expectations - Jacob committed to finishing out his education while trying to find some enjoyment at school (and elsewhere) and we would take a step back and realize that he was not going to be completely satisfied where he was. And it broke my heart. Not only because he wasn't going to be happy where he was, but that we realistically couldn't change the situation either. We kept moving forward, seeing the light at the end of the tunnel growing brighter. Graduation day was going to get here and then his future would really begin.

While Jacob always insisted that he had no friends at Lourdes, I saw many students say hello to him, calling him by name. I saw students become his "friend" on Facebook. Maybe his definition of friend was different than what I was seeing but certainly people liked him. He knew this also and appreciated that the people he encountered at school were nice and were kind to him. Of that he had no argument.

On to Graduation Day. Jacob had no intention of going to Commencement but that was just not going to happen. Proud Mama here wanted to see my son, on stage, get his diploma that he had worked so hard to achieve. As he was waiting to process in to the hall for the ceremony, many students and faculty congratulated him on his accomplishments (he graduated with high honors) and a couple even asked to have their picture taken with him. As we sat in the hall and students were each taking their turn walking across the stage to get their diploma, we would hear bursts of small groups applaud for each of them - friends and family members of the graduate showing them some love. And then it was Jacob's turn in line and I planned on letting out a big YEAH!!! and then something happened that warmed my heart. When Jacob's name was announced, it wasn't just a small smattering of applause - it was a room full! Many students gave him a standing ovation. Someone in the audience hollered "Go, Jacob"! And yes, there were tears in my eyes. Because the kid who had "no friends" turned out to have many friends. People who cared. People who saw beyond the physical limitations and knew the dedication and hard work that he had put into his 5 years as an undergrad. A few of those students knew he was struggling to find his place (he posts about his life occasionally on Facebook) but they let him know in those few short moments that he was recognized and appreciated.

Jacob said last night before bed that he had a good day (despite Graduation being kind of long). He heard the people applauding for him and he was touched. This doesn't change how he felt over the past few years (the grass is still greener on the other side) but through the acknowledgement of those around him - his "friends" - he felt appreciated. And don't we all want to feel that from our peers? I think sometimes, feeling cared about, can be more powerful than a fleeting friendship or two.

We can't go back and give Jacob the college experience he had wished for. And truthfully, I'm not sure he would have found what he was looking for at another school. My wish, as he makes his way in this world, is that people will take a moment to truly see the man his is - funny and warm, smart, kind and caring. I pray he finds many friends to be by his side and always appreciate him. I hope that those he encounters give him a chance and look past his disability. And I hope that the next time you have an opportunity to show some small kindness to another - especially someone who may be "different" - you applaud and let them know that they are valuable. It can make a huge difference in someone's day - and someone's life.

Being a Mother

Being a Mother means:

1. Putting yourself second and not regretting that position for one second

2. Learning to listen to words that are not spoken aloud

3. Knowing that getting a "good night's sleep" is often futile but understanding the reasons for why it is this way sometimes and accepting

4. Gaining a new respect for vegetables and a balanced diet, not only for ourselves but more importantly, for our children

5. Becoming a collector of memories in all shapes and sizes

6. Wearing many hats: nurse, advocate, psychologist, police officer, maid and most importantly, friend

7. Being the "bad guy" when it's necessary (which also makes you the "good guy" in the long run)

8. Adapting and responding to new circumstances and situations in the blink of an eye

9. Feeling unconditional love for another human being. You may have thought you found that when you married your husband but it multiplies ten-fold when you're a mother

10. Making mistakes but learning from every. single. one. and becoming a better person because of them


However you spent your day, I hope it was the happiest Mother's Day ever!

Mother's Day Bracelet

I have a new project posted at Mama on the Fly - this time, a simple gift for Mom. And it's not too late - you can make one of these in a couple of hours tops!


Let's make a beaded bracelet for Mom this Mother's Day. Here's what you need:

Wire snips or an old pair of scissors

Needle nose pliers
Jewelry wire
A package or two of beads (your choice of color and shape)

*Keep in mind  - if you buy two different packages of beads, they should be somewhat similar in size and watch out for beads that might be too big and bulky on a bracelet.

A clasp of some sort - I prefer the toggle clasp (you can see what it looks like in the pictures below)

A package of crimp tubes

* All of my supplies were purchased at Hobby Lobby

I spent about $13.50 on the above supplies (I already had the tools) and I had enough product to make 2 bracelets.

Start with a length of wire. My bracelet size is 7 1/2 " so I started with a piece of wire measuring about 8 1/2 ".  If Mom is petite, you might only need to start with 7 1/2 " or so but I'm a bigger gal so I need that extra inch :)

 Start by threading one end of your wire into a crimp tube first and then into the loop on one piece of the toggle clasp.

 Now bring the wire over the loop and insert it back into the crimp tube.

Pull the short tail of the wire until the crimp tube is snug against the loop of the toggle piece. Grab your pliers and pinch the crimp tube so it flattens. This will secure the wire in place and keep it from slipping out of the crimp tube.

Now, depending on the beads you purchased, you might want to lay them out on your work surface in an arrangement that you like so threading them onto the wire will be quick and easy. This is the arrangement I started with:

I did have to make some adjustments to this arrangement as I was working on the bracelet because I had more beads than wire but you can adjust as you go.

Once you have an arrangement you like, start threading beads on the wire. This is the part that the kids can definitely help with! Remember that little tail of wire you had when you attached one piece of the toggle clasp? Just slide it inside the first bead or two to hide it.

Continue stringing beads until you have about an inch of wire left. Leave enough wire to work through a second crimp tube and the other half of your toggle clasp. Run it around the loop of the clasp and back into the crimp tube again, just like you did when you started the bracelet. Pull the tail of this wire snugly so there is not a lot of empty wire showing in your bracelet. Once it's snug, pinch the crimp tube with your pliers.

And your bracelet is done!

Here is a picture of the 2nd bracelet I made using the same supplies, just a different color combination of beads:

 

I hope you enjoy this project - I'm sure Mom will love her gift because who doesn't like jewelry? Thank you for stopping by! For more Mother's Day ideas, be sure to visit Petite-Party Planners and check out my review of Iron Man 3 at Are You on the Fence!
 

My weekend in photos

It was a good weekend for this:

Free Comic Book Day
Kyle (in blue), Aimee (in pink), Jacob (in chair)
 

and this:

Iron Man 3 - review at Are You on the Fence

and buying these:

and these:

Now to get them planted!

And doing a little of this:

Yes, there was also a little stress but when isn't there a little stress? I choose to believe that the good of the weekend outweighed any concerns. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

I hope you had a great weekend too!

Latest

As I mentioned before, I started selling some cards through a local florist a couple of weeks ago and they are selling! Woot! Of course, that means I had to start putting in more time to get some additional stock ready so I've been busy making cards, including Mother's Day cards, which is right around the corner! We'll see how these sell. Here's a quick peek at one included in the bunch:

 I also just completed an order for a friend who is a real estate agent. She buys cards she can give to clients when they close on their home purchase. Here's a look at a couple of her assortment:

And the other thing I busied myself with this past week is taking some pictures of my daughter and her baby bump at 14 weeks. You can see the whole gallery here  - here's one of my favorites:

So that's what I've been busy with (well, that and getting the son finished up with the last couple weeks of college - and then graduation - yeehaw!!!) What have you been up to?

My Time Made Easy - May Release

If you're here for the May sneak peek and release for My Time Made Easy, I am sadly not participating this month due to other committments. Be sure to stop by Lauren's blog and hop through the rest of the design team's blogs, though, as you have a chance to win a free template! And this month's is a must-have!

Be back with new things to share soon!

PTI Blog Hop

As you all know by now, I am a BIG Papertrey Ink fan! I always try to participate in the monthly customer blog hop but last night, as I was catching up on some other crafting, I thought I just did not have time to get a card ready for today. Drats! And then I woke up this morning, had an idea for an easy card and whipped this out while waiting for my son to finish eating his breakfast:

The theme of this month's hop is Tilted - which isn't very easy for me but that's why they call it a challenge! I used the (yet to be inked) Square Prints stamps and Spring Rain ink to create the pattern on the card front, added an Enchanted Evening strip along the top edge and stamped two sentiments (from one of the Mat Stack collections - I think #2) in Enchanted Evening as well. My ink got a little heavy on the word "celebrate" but hey, that's a good word to "highlight" at any rate!

Ok, back to work (shhh...I popped on just to get this post ready).  Have fun hopping!